luni, 16 ianuarie 2012

Alas, I'm living in a grown up wold

I can’t sleep, it’s 2am and I've given in, got up and came here with the perfectly good excuse that I had decided to start writing in here again...just write, like some sort of journal...The “I can’t sleep part” happens rarely, I am usually so tired that I don’t have a problem sleeping...always around midnight, I can’t do it before!, but after this 3 weeks vacation and one week of sleeping in every day and one liter of Pepsi (which I love, but drink maybe once every 3 months or so) here I am…Oh well, maybe I’m also hiding some facts here, like maybe I can’t sleep because of some thoughts but hey, you can’t expect me to be quite open on my first entry after the prolonged pause of journaling…nor can I promise to ever be able to open up completely, ever, in the cyberspace…but it’s a start, right?


2012 hasn’t started very well, but that’s nothing new to me, disappointments have been part of my life since…a long time, so my defense system can deal with them pretty well. Because, as a very good friend of mine told me once, “Just keep being yourself, don’t change, and if the others can’t keep up…it’s their problem”. Right he is, I only have to work on the “care less” department now and I’m all set.

I received a phone call from a girlfriend around 11pm tonight and we talked for about an hour…about nothing special, just her heart troubles, about why/how come she likes a guy and about why/how come he likes her and about why/how come it’s complicated etc…I was watching “Sex and the City” and it seemed like one those dialogues and I was thinking why in the world do things have to be so complicated all the time? Actually why in the world do people have to complicate things as simple as liking/loving someone? I told her that, since her ego couldn’t allow her to text/call him on futile/teenage grounds…

Oh wait, I know, I’ve got to stop thinking things as a child, and realize grown up world has codes to consider and unwritten laws to follow…When will I ever learn that?

2 comentarii:

feudalserfer spunea...

Don't ever 'grow up', Pati; it's overrated! Most of the wicked things done in this world are perpetrated by so-called grown-ups.

Patricia spunea...

:) I'll try... even if it's become hard to...